Greg Behrendt – getting old’s a bitch

PHYLLIS DILLER stand up special

You know you’re old if your walker has an airbag. quotes: “From 12 on, the only way to handle the terror of social situations was comedy — break the ice, make everybody laugh. I did it to make people feel more relaxed, including myself.” “No one knew I was living with an agoraphobic sex tyrant […]

FLIP WILSON with George Carlin

“The devil made me do it.”

“”What you see is what you get!”

“The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.”

GEORGE CARLIN completely uncensored

“I love this country. You can say what you want about this country, I love this place. I love the freedoms we used to have…”

DICK GREGORY a living legend

“I am really enjoying the new Martin Luther King Jr stamp – just think about all those white bigots, licking the backside of a black man.”

JIM BREUER party in your stomach

“Next time you go drinking remember, its like going to a party, but the party’s in your stomach”

KEY & PEEL text message confusion

“I’ve been trying to reach you all day, are we on for tonight?”

DOG TEASE – bacon

“I went to the fridge and I opened up the meat drawer, and you know what I found in there?”
“No, what?”